Music Notes and Hunting Tracks
by 007twihunger
Summary: In the wake of becoming one of the new victors Madge is forced 2 navigate a completely new game, with the next Quarter Quill coming, as well as being ignored&fooled by her district partner she is once again alone trying to put her life back together. When out of nowhere she, along with her fellow victors are thrown back into the game. *I don't own Hunger Games Suzanne Collins does.
1. Chapter 1

*Author note- Sorry about the long over due wait for my Catching fire, but its finally here! I feel incredibly terrible for how long it has taken to post this. However, things happened in my life that I had no way of controlling and I had to take an extended break from writing, you see I was in a car accident, which resulted me with breaking my hand and wrist then not too long after that my grandmother, who practically raised me had to get open heart surgery so I had to step up and take care of her. Everything thing seems to be calming down for the most part so I hope I will be able to post either once a week or once every other week, I know a lot sooner than what I had been doing. I'm not going to drag on any further I know you guys just want to have fun and read so I hope you all enjoy this. I'm sorry for any errors that I may have missed. Feel free to leave any comments or whatever, happy reading trails mates. -007twihunger xoxo

* * *

 **Music Notes and Hunting Tracks**

 **Chapter One:** **The Bitter Return**

The crowd cheers, roar throughout the station. My cheeks hurt from the forced smile I have plastered on my face. My hand waves exuberantly, as if I have anyone besides Peeta here for me. Gale's hand, that holds tightly to mine feels like an anchor of pain to my heart, a lie that only him, Haymitch, and myself know about.

I can't help but look around for some familiar faces. I feel a real smile touch my lips as I spot a very familiar blond head, with a large cheery smile plastered widely across his face. Though, my smile soon leaves my face as I see the slightly smiling face of Katniss near his side. Her gray eyes locked on my fellow tribute making my stomach turn with disgust. Why is she with Peeta while looking at Gale like that?

I swallow the lump in my throat and flit my eyes through the crowd, seeing Peeta's brothers and his father, Delly, my father, Darrius, and a very out of place Finnick Odair. My eyes stare in amazement at my long time friend, a large wolfish grin spreads across my lips as does one on Finnick's face, though I note a strange glimmer in his beautiful green eyes. Moving my gaze away from Finn's takes a bit more force than I'm expecting, probably because I'm so surprised to see him here. To, see him in district twelve when his district didn't win. With this thought I can't help but think about the sweet innocent face of River, and with the thought of him comes the thought of my little bird, of Rue.

Forcing my dreary thoughts away takes a bit more force than I'm use to but then again before hand I had more stable ground for the basing of my life, but now my life it up in the air. Not knowing what may fall and when it will, though trying to keep it all unblemished and preserved. Smiling like normal I let my eyes stare at Finnick, using him as a focal point for me. A place that won't make me crash into a thousand pieces of erratic fear and pain.

Though, the sky is bright and cloudless everything feels bleak. And though, the crowd cheers out excitedly for us, I know its really all for Gale. He is the one out of the two of us that everyone could accept. Who would want to accept a townie like me, especially with my father being Mayor, I might as well be from the Capitol itself.

Before I know it, Effie is leading us onto the stage and my father is reading a speech but all I hear is my heart hammering painfully loudly in my ears. I can't help but stare blankly out into the crowd until a large hand is clamped gently on my shoulder. Looking over to my right I see the guarded face of my father. I feel my face go pale from the unknown look upon his face, but he doesn't seem to mind in the least. Instead he looks at me with a distant look in his eye making me feel even more alone than I already do.

"Congratulations, the both of you." My father says in his business voice, shaking hands with both of us, but not making any attempt in looking into my eyes. This alone feels like a punch to my gut. I really am alone now, aren't I?

The crowd cheers again as Gale and I, are lead off the stage and to the victor village. I feel a large lump form in my throat finally realizing that I won't be living at home anymore. I'll be all alone in my own big house, but at least its near Haymitch, even if he did betray me. At least he is there in case I need him. As we walk, Gale makes sure to keep a good distance between us, paying no attention to the large crowd that follows us on the path to the victor village, I know not many of them are here to wish me luck with my future and congratulate my coming home. As we come to the gates of the victor village and stop not missing a beat, Gale's family appear and take turns hugging him. I stand awkwardly to the side watching this. Taking in the wide smiles he gets from his family and friends, and from some of the people I'm sure he doesn't know very well at all.

"Hey…" I hear a hesitantly small voice say from beside me, which makes me jump slightly.

Turning to my left I can't help but smile in bewilderment at the sight of one of Gale's younger brothers, Rory, who smiles shyly at me. His cheeks tinting pink from embarrassment.

"Hey." I mumble out, unsure of what really to say to him. I mean what do you say to the brother of the guy who demolished your heart? What is there really to say?

"I'm glad you came home. Thanks for before… I was really scared and kind of acted like a baby, but I'm glad you were there to help my stupid big headed brother. Thanks for helping him get home. You were pretty amazing in there." Rory says, his smile growing wider. "How are you feeling being back home now? I mean you're a victor and all, so I'm sure its cool."

I can't find any words to say, so my mouth opens and closes a few times. My eyes staring into the same gray eyes Gale has, feeling my throat tighten even more. I force an awkward smile and manage to get out a choked laugh that sounds more like a pained grunt, but Rory doesn't seem to mind in the least as he smiles broadly at me. I guess he must think I'm some type of hero for swearing to die to get him home, then turning tactics to help save his older brother. Even if I'm absolutely sure he would have made it home on his own, regardless of my help. Gale's a smart tough guy.

A loud shrill of laughter causes us to both look towards the source of it, which happens to be a delighted Posy who Gale throws up into the air before catching her and repeating the process. We both stare at them silently. I can't help but feel envious of the close knitted relationship he has with his family. Of the siblings he has, as well as the friends, knowing completely, that we live distinct different lives here in District Twelve. I feel so out of place that I find myself taking a step back from the scene with a blank face. Wanting more than ever to retreat into my room to try and deal with my empty loneliness in peace by myself.

My back comes in contact with a sturdy chest that makes me instantly turn around in surprise only to come face to face with Finnick. A genuine smile is splayed across his lips causing me to smile in return. Though, this only happens for a few seconds before the very stern voice of Gale grits out, "Rory! Get over here, now!"

Looking over my shoulder I meet Gale's gaze for the first time since the train, and I wish that I hadn't. His eyes are a blaze with raw disgust and hatred and all targeted towards me. I feel my heart and stomach drop from just the sight and find myself muttering out a weak, "Its fine Rory, I'll see you around some time." Before turning tail and walking back from the victor village towards my fathers house.

I can hear the gravel crunching underneath someone's feet from behind me but I don't turn around and instead I keep my eyes on the gravel path in front of me, making sure I don't trip over anything. Praying with all my might that the pain in my chest will subside, but knowing other wise. I don't have to think for too long about who it is behind me before a very familiar voice fills the air.

"Tough crowd you're running with these days Madge. All angst and anger, and all misplaced." Finnick states, as he comes to walk at my side at a leisurely pace.

"I don't really run with anyone, Finn." I breath out. I glance over at him before returning my eyes to the graveled path in front of us.

"Is that so? Then I suppose I'll have you all to myself while I'm visiting district twelve."

"I suppose you'd be right, I guess. How long are going to be I district twelve? And excuse my bluntness, but why are you here Finnick?"

My words causes him to laugh heartily, though I do note that its off in a curious manner, one that I can't quite put my finger on. So instead of wasting time to dwell on this, I smile over at Finnick, enjoying the sound of his laughter while deeply wishing it were Gale beside me. I'm so wrapped up in thought, that I don't notice Finnick has stopped walking until he grabs my hand and gently, yet forcefully stops me in my tracks. Turning to look at him, I notice he has a concern look in his eyes that makes me feel depressed I can't hide my inner turmoil.

"Where are you off to, Pearl?" Finnick says. His hand lets go of mine hesitantly before he stuffs it, along with the other into the front pockets of his pants.

Looking into Finnick's serene green eyes and at his charming, genuine smile I feel my mind ease, if just by a little, but enough to allow me to think properly. I lick my lips then absentmindedly rub my upper left arm. Turning away from him, I glance around us trying to think up a good response.

"Was going to head home…" I reply after a moment before trailing off. Knowing that Finnick's the one person that I really don't need to put on an act for. "I shouldn't have left, huh?"

"Maybe so, but we've already left. Want to show me around? It will be a good way to just take a breather and get a grip on yourself… Plus its would be like something you would usually do, showing around an important visitor." Finnick pipes up, knocking his shoulder into mine, causing me to smile slightly before shaking my head, a chuckle springing from my lips. Finnick takes my sudden change of emotions as his chance to link my arm through his then pulls me back towards the town square. The gravel crunching underneath our feet swiftly turn to dull thumbs as the path turned to dirt.

I can't help but hold tightly to Finn's arm, thanking the gods that he doesn't seem to mind. My eyes trail up to the crisp blue sunny sky, wishing more than anything that my life was as carefree as this sky, but knowing that would never be possible again for me. Once again I find my mind lazily turning back over to the events in the games, pausing in my stride I pull Finnick to a stop as well as I squeeze my eyes shut tightly fighting back the horrible memories. Opening my eyes, I let out a ragged breath then let my eyes dart around us, taking in the shops in town. I can feel Finnick's eyes on me so instead of dwelling on a soft spot for the two of us, I push a smile out of me and look over at him.

"My friend Peeta Mellark's family owns that bakery. They're the very best. Come on, you have to try something." I manage to get out in a cheery voice as I pull him with me towards the familiar bakery.

Pushing open the bakery door, my ears are met with the very comforting sound of the bell overheard chiming our arrival. I smile seeing Peeta's beaming face behind the counter but my smile falters as I see the scowling face of Rye Mellark standing next to him. I pause staring at them acting as if I'm going over the menu hanging just above their heads, even though I'm pretty confident that I have it memorized by now. Rye leans into Peeta and whispers something to him, that causes the youngest Mellark boy to nod then with that Rye quickly disappears into the back of the bakery and away from my prying eyes. I mean I can see why he would be upset with me. We were… I guess kind of boyfriend and girlfriend, even if he never asked me officially. So seeing me with Gale in the arena must have been hurtful, not to mention that his friends probably made fun of him loosing me to a seam boy. It was never a secret that Gale and Rye detest each other and for me to go from one to the other must have been a huge blow for Rye to take, but I had honestly thought our friendship was stronger than him just ignoring me and not giving me a chance to explain my actions. Did he just want me to die in the game rather then see me with his rival?

I swallow down my nerves and strain some to keep my smile in place as I look over at Finnick, "you have got to try the strawberry cheese cake or an apple turnover. They're the best, so yummy." I pipe up then pull Finnick with me towards the counter where a smiling Peeta greets us.

"Good morning! How can I help you two this afternoon?" Peeta says, looking from me to Finnick then back again. When his eyes come back to rest on me I notice a flicker of curiosity but I silently shake my head, indicating we'll talk about it later.

"Well, since Madge says I should try either the strawberry cheese cake or an apple turnover, I'll take two of each." Finnick states, then gives me a wink for good measures. I know this is going to give me an earful from Peeta, whenever we talk next.

Peeta looks at both of us again then gives a slow nod, "coming right up." He replies, entering the order into the cash register. Out of habit I open my mouth to tell him to put it on my fathers account but before I can, Finnick quickly hands Peeta the exact change expected before turning towards me with a soft smile, "it's a welcome home gift." He explains then turns away from me.

Feeling shy I turn my eyes away from Finnick, who intently looks over the menu, to stare out the front window of the bakery. I watch as people bustle around cheerily, no doubt excited for the upcoming welcome home celebration this evening. I feel my worries knot in my stomach at the thought of running into Gale, Rye, and Katniss. All of who I'd like to evade for as long as I possibly can.

On occasion a few people will look in through the window but just as soon as they have seen me they would hurriedly turn away and pick up their pace, making me feel even more alone. I can't help but think if this is how Finnick, Annie, Johanna, and Haymitch all feel? Is that why they take other means to help them deal with their new reality? I feel my throat tighten as my hands begin to shake not helping but be able to think about if my father will continue to ignore me. I know he is without a doubt doing this for my benefit, so I won't have to be forced into anything by President Snow, but he must know its not going to help me in the least. If anything its hurting me even more.

"Ready?" Finnick's cautious yet cheerful voice asks, causing me to swing around to face him. My cheeks tinted pink from a blush of embarrassment at being so caught up in my thoughts that I didn't hear him approach me. Not being able to muster up any words I just nod.

I glance back at Peeta and give him a small smile and a hesitant wave that he gladly returns making me feel a small amount of ease wave over me, if just by a little.

Walking out of the bakery a cold breeze blows against my face. I smile inwardly not realizing how much I have actually missed my home. Not that it has anything to do with the people really since I didn't have that many in my corner to begin with but I always did love how the weather is. Soon the colds of winter would be making its way over district twelve blanketing it with fresh white snow, that I always cherished watching as a child.

"We should head over to your dads office, I have some business to discuss with him then you can continue on with this tour." Finnick says giving me a comforting smile.

Looking up at Finnick I can't manage to hide the uneasy expression on my face and he must sense that because the next second I know he pulls me in for a side hug and whispers against the top of my head, "how about you go and get whatever you need to get done then we'll meet up in the square and I'll get you all to myself. I'm sure your friends would like to welcome you home, but their probably all too shy to approach you while I'm here."

I want to laugh at his words but instead I just smile and hesitantly nod my head and watch as he walks off towards the justice building. As my eyes trail after Finnick, I notice that Rye is standing in the mouth of the alleyway leading to the back of the bakery, and he's watching me with a glare on his face. I feel myself pale from just the look, not use to receiving a look like this targeted at me from someone I had thought was my friend. Before I can collect myself, Rye stomps over to me and stops a foot away, though the glare doesn't leave his face.

"You move on pretty quick." He states with malice, that effectively cuts me straight to my heart. I can't help but inch back from him at his lashing words but before I can make anymore space between us, Rye angrily grabs my forearm and jerks me back towards him, until we're chest to chest. He still tightly holds onto my arm, hurting me in the process. "You chuck me out for that seam trash-what because he always ignored you? Was that it? Was he not enough for you so you had to move onto Odair? Moving onto better things, huh Madge? I bet your fathers so proud of you-"

Without thinking anything and just plainly seeing red I jerk back from Rye and slap him across the face as hard as I can. The loud sound fills the air then an eerily silence follows after. Rye stares at me in surprise and I stare back at him in disbelief as my chest rises and falls rapidly. I can feel people staring at us before the whispering starts but for once I don't care. How dare he say those things to me! We had been friends and this is how he treats me after I returned from almost dying? It's not like he even gave me an opportunity to plead my case to let him know of all that has transpired but I guess this is the real him, ugly anger and all.

"What the fuck, Madge!" Rye finally says after regaining his voice as he gingerly rubs at his red cheek, his eyes glared at me with accusations he won't say anymore on.

"How dare you." I whisper lowly into the air, my eyes burning with betrayal. I had thought he might be upset with me but I had also thought he would come to me and talk like a rational person. My arm still stings from his tight grasp on me but I can't seem to care as tears well up in my eyes. Shaking my head at him I turn to head back to the victory village but stop as I see a confused looking Gale and an annoyed looking Katniss. My eyes trial between the two before I turn around and run away as fast as I can not caring how crazy I must seem. Because I know I am just that. I'm so cracked that I'm breaking.

By the time I stop running, my sides are cramped with pain from over exertion and my throat is raw with hot pain. I bend over at the waist and grasp my thighs tightly as I heave in air, trying to regain my even breathing. Looking up and around me I try to distract myself by seeing where I am. I frown while panting for breath as I take in the familiar looking seam, that surrounds all around me. I glance forward, back, from left to right and I have no idea where I am. All around me looks the same. All the small shack looking houses all look incredibly similar that I feel dread start to pool inside my stomach. My gaze lifts to the sky which I notice is darkening, telling of the late time. In a few hours or so, I know the welcoming celebration will be starting in the town square but I have no idea of how to get there in the least.

Releasing a sigh of defeat I straighten back up finally having regain my breathing, and as I do I take notice of the coal dust that is smeared against the bottoms and sides of my shoes and is somehow on the hem of my white dress. Looking around me again I decide to start searching from the right trail to hopefully find my way back to town, but with little probability since I'm not too familiar with the seam.

I get a few glares from the people of the seam who go out of their way to avoid me to the point that they'll turn around and take a different direction. I've never felt this alone in my whole entire life and not being able to help it I feel my tears from earlier well back up into my eyes, only this time they leak over my eyelids and glide down my cheeks. I'm lost and no one will help me. Everyone thinks I'm a disease. Trying to contain my soft sobs, I drop my head so I'm staring at my coal covered shoes, not wanting to see the dirty looks the seam people give me any longer.

As I continue to walk around the seam I see a dirty pair of shoes come to stand in my way forcing me to stop then to look up. And when I do, I'm met with the kind face of a guy about my age, but the more that I stare at him he looks about Gale's age. He has the normal seam tanned skin and lanky slender build, while an unruly crop of black hair hangs lowly in front of his kind gray eyes. But unlike the normal seam people I've come so use to dealing with he is smiling at me, and not in a condescending mean way. I stare at him with uncertainty coming off me in waves. What does he want from me?

"Madge Undersee, right?" His friendly voice says in a gravely tone. He reaches out a hand in front of me waiting for me to shake it. Awkwardly I look down at his hand then back up at him before my hand hesitantly raise up and clasps his and shakes it in greeting.

"Yeah, that's me. And you are?" I manage to say slightly above a whisper making the guy in front of me smile even wider as he pulls his hand from mine and stuffs it along with his other hand into the front pockets of his jeans.

"Thom. Thom Harris, I'm dating Delly… And I'm best friends with Gale." He informs, his eyes finally looking away awkwardly like he doesn't know where to look at, and this causes my heart to lurch again, even he knew about Gale's acting, gods I feel so stupid.

"Its fine… You don't need to tiptoe around me, I know Gale was putting on an act. So, you're dating Delly? That's great! She was gushing about you on the reaping. I'm really happy for the two of you… But uh, what do you want with me?" I say all in a jumble, trying to end this conversation as fast as I can so I can continue on my way of trying to get out of here.

"You looked lost. I was just trying to help you, but I didn't want you to think I was some weirdo trying to hit on you or anything." He chuckles awkwardly, rubbing at the back of his neck as the tips of his ears blushed red. "I can take you to the town square if you want? I was on my way there to meet with Delly when I saw you. She would have my ass if I just left you… Plus, you've never done anything for me to hate you Madge. You've always been really nice, even if you don't recall me. Delly has told me about how good a friend you've been to her-she cried, you know when you were in the games. She really cares about you and the friendship you share… And for that I'm really grateful for you, so uh, thanks Madge."

I smile shyly up at Thom and nod happily that I've found someone nice to help me out of the seam, and even happier knowing that sweet innocent Delly has found herself a good guy to date. With a nod of his own, Thom gestures to the right with his chin then starts walking and I follow him obediently, overjoyed knowing I won't miss the ceremony, gods only know what would happen to me if I did.

"So, uh… You okay, with the whole Gale thing? I mean, I don't want to pry or anything… But I know it must suck and you might not feel like you can talk to anyone, and even though Gale is my best friend I'm aware of how much an ass he can be… Especially to you, so if you ever need to talk to anyone. I'm hear to listen and I swear I won't tell anyone, not even Delly." Thom puts forth, staring straight ahead as we walk next to each other.

My lips turn up into a smile, feeling happy about possibly making a new friend. "Thanks, I'll keep that in mind Thom." I say.

"Delly's making me wear one of her old mans old suits, so I can come to the real party with her at your dads house. I'm pretty excited, I've never been in the mayors house, so I guess having to deal with that itchy suit will be a compromise for the party, and I get to spend time with Delly like I'm a townie."

"You know, Delly likes you regardless if your from the seam or town"

"Yeah I know. She's a great girl. I'm still so shocked she's my girlfriend. I never thought someone so beautiful and smart like her would go for some goof off like me, but I guess they say opposites attract and I can't help but be damned happy about that. You can hang out with us if you want during the party-I mean I know its your dads house and you probably already have your friends to hang out with, but the offers there. I know Delly would love to spend a little more time with you, and it'd be cool to be at least friends with my girlfriends best friend."

"Yeah, that would be a lot more fun then being forced into boring conversations."

We both burst out laughing, and I feel the uncertain tension that had surrounded us ease. Maybe we could become friends, gods know I need more of those, especially now.

We continue walking and the seam slowly merges with the town and I feel even more at ease knowing I for sure won't be late, and the fact that I finally know where we are. The further we make our way into town the more a knot of nervousness starts to twist in my stomach, mostly from fear that I will have to run into Gale, I can only hope and pray that I won't also have to run into Rye. I don't think I could deal with having to endure both of them. Before I know what's happening a tall slender body slams into me from the side and hugs me tightly making my eyes grow wide until I realize its Delly, then I smile weakly and hug her back just as tightly.

"How are you doing, Madge? I missed you so much, I'm so glad you're home." She sputters out before I feel her start to shake from tears causing me to feel uncomfortable. But then she starts to laugh goofily, and knowing her it because she feels silly for even crying openly in the town square in the first place. Smiling at her I pull back and shrug awkwardly then run my hands up against my arms as if to warm them up, even though I can't really feel much besides the way my heart hammers in my chest, knowing so many people are here and some of them could be the few I don't want to run into too soon. At least not before I've given it any thought about what to think of this situation and how I want to proceed through it.

Looking around us Delly let out a laugh and swipes the tears from her eyes. Just like the Delly I know and Love, I can't help but smile wider at her, thanking the gods I have someone so carefree as a friend.

"Is that what you're going to be wearing for the ceremony?" Delly ask looking at my coal covered dress with a raised blond brow making me laugh out loud, my head falling backwards, and for the first time since coming home feeling at real comfort ease.

"No. Just have to head over to my-I-to my dads house to change then I'll meet you guys." I say with a shake of my hair that cause my curls to sway around my shoulders.

Delly and Thom both give me friendly smiles as they nod understandingly. Then with a billowing twirl of my dress I turn around on my heels and walk off towards my old house, one I'm no longer will be able to live in. I had a slight feeling that maybe my dad would let me stay for a while, or just until I get myself together enough to stand on my own two feet, but the obvious avoiding of me he's been doing tells me other wise. I just make it out of sight of the town square and the instant I do I feel someone walk up behind me causing me to stop and whirl around on alert, only to let out an audible sigh of relief at seeing the smiling face of Darius, probably one of the only peacekeepers I don't mind being around since he's more like a goofball than an authority figure. Smiling at him I stare at him with confusion marring my face.

"Can I help you Darius?" I ask meekly, looking around at all the disgusted looks I'm still attracting before feeling crestfallen and obverting my gaze back to the cheery peacekeeper in front of me.

"Yeah, Mr. Odair is looking for you. You were supposed to meet him somewhere but you never showed up, so your dad sent a few of us out to search for you. I'm supposed to bring you back to your dads house the instant I find you, so you can get ready for the ceremony." He replies, giving me a flirty wink that makes me want to laugh, but the dirty looks I receive from all around me stop me from doing so, so instead I just nod.

"Ignore them. They're just ignorant fools, always targeting hate for things that a lot of us can't change. So shall we?"

Taking Darius's offered arm, we make our way towards my fathers house. The whole way Darius makes idle conversation about things I can't force myself to pay attention to because I'm too hyperaware of all the ugly looks I'm getting. You would think I would be use to this type of thing now but I guess not. Maybe if my imagined world of happiness with Gale would have come true, maybe it would have been a hell of a lot easier to deal with. But being destroyed by his rejection that took me by blindside I just feel like I'm barely hanging on by a thread of sanity.

"Sorry I couldn't really visit with you when you headed off for the Capitol. I had to work, but I did get to see you off, though I didn't get to talk to you or even wish you good luck." He states. He looks over at me with a gentle smile, his eyes shining with kindness.

Looking back at him, I can't suppress a loud chuckle as I realize that one of the peacekeepers that took us from the justice building and to the train station was none other than Darius himself.

"Well, thank you. I probably would have recognize you under different circumstances, so I apologize whole heartedly." I reply, turning back to look at the path in front of us that twists and turns slightly before turning into a straight stretch to my fathers house. "How have you been doing, Darius? Good, I hope."

"Well, besides missing my favorite goldilocks, just fine."

"Well, I'm back now, so fill free to bug me any time. Gods know I'll have a lot of free time on my hands now.

I know he must know that I don't really want to be by myself by my words and my slightly trembling voice that betrays me thoroughly. I didn't know how good it would feel to be back home and having some people treating me the exact same, but gods it does. Even though this have changed drastically in some aspects of my life, some things are still comfortably normal, while others are entirely different.

Just as we round the corner coming up to my fathers house a tall, tan, blond blur rushes over to us and quickly pulls me into a solid chest and away from Darius. I know its Finnick, even without the faint scent of sea salt clinging to his body. Smiling, I return his tight grasp on me, knowing he must of thought up some terrible scenarios from me just seemingly disappearing out of no where.

"Good to see you too, Finn. This is my friend Darius, Darius this is my good friend Finnick." I state in a calm voice, my eyes going from Finnick to Darius before back again as I indicate to each of them in turn, a wide beaming smile on my lips. As I pull back from Finnick, I watch as he glances over at Darius and gives him a acknowledgment with a swift nod of his head, which Darius reciprocates.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Odair." Darius says kindly.

"You too, listen Madge, we have to get going." Finnick replies, his green eyes fixing me with a intense gaze that causes me to loose my words, so I just nod then give Darius a small thankful smile, "thanks for walking me back, Darius. I'll see you around." I say in my usual voice though even to me it sound a little flat. Maybe from the exhaustion, I should be able to sleep well now that I'm home.

"No problem, Goldilocks. I'll see you around." Darius replies with his usual large wolfish smile before he turns around and begins walking back towards the town center. Letting out a low sigh I link my arm through the crook of Finnick's arm and let him tow me to my once home.

Since we're already pretty close to the house, it doesn't take us too much longer to get to it. Though, we both stay eerily quiet as we walk, no doubt, both of us having large things weighing on our minds. Walking up the familiar steps feels anything but familiar, its different now that this is no longer my home. And not just different because my mother is no longer here, but because now I am all alone, living in that large house in the Victory Village, with only Haymitch and Gale and his family as my neighbors. I swallow thickly as I pull my arm gently back from Finnick and wipe my moist palms against the sides of my dress, then I plaster on a bright smile and with a calming intake of air I open the door and this time I lead Finnick.

We stop just over the threshold and watch silently as maids and butlers rush around the house making sure everything is as it should be for the party in Gale and my honor. Absently, I let my eyes roam over the room. Noticing that everything is in exactly the same place they were when I was last in this house, the very same day that I had ignorantly thought I would be coming back home to have some delicious baked goods from the Mellark's bakery, but the reaping had other ideas. My eyes catches with the head maid Mable, who is arranging a beautiful bouquet of pink tulips. Her grey eyes crinkle around the edges as she smiles warmly at me then with a last calculative glance at the flower arrangement she walks over to where I stand and hesitantly pulls me into a comforting hug that makes my breath stutter and my eyes burn with fresh tears that I won't let leave my eyes.

"You did just fine in there child. I prayed for you while you were away, couldn't have our little pear swept away now could I? We're all going to miss you now that you live in that big ole fancy house. You'll have to make time and to come see your father and us, and I won't take no for an answer… How are you handling your mothers passing? She somehow got into her medicine and took too much. I blame myself for not being there to stop her. She was always in pain, so maybe now he's in peace with the angles." Marble rushes out, hugging me tighter. My throat feels tighter with every word she utters. I feel like I might puke just alone thinking about my late mother. Though, I have to admit that I want to burst out laughing at even the thought of her being lucid enough to administrate medicine to herself, she hasn't been able to do that since before I was born, she never liked sticking herself with needles. I know in my heart that Snow is the reason she is dead. He sent someone here to administrate that death, to let me know to stay in my place. And with only my father and Haymitch left of my family I can't let that happen, I will have to endure whatever he tells me to, to keep the ones I love safe.

Pulling back from Mabel, I smile with vacant eyes, that I let trail over the room as if I were taking it all in, even though I'm too consumed with reminding myself to breath. "You guys outdid yourselves this year. Everything looks simply divine." I manage to get out in a reasonable sounding voice. As I turn my watery eyes away from Mable's watchful eye, drilling myself silently to be tougher. Once I'm sure my eyes are no longer glassy from welled up tears I turn back to look at Mable and smile wider. "Is my father home yet?" I question, fighting to push the innocent words out as dread grabs ahold of my heart. Fear billowing up like a cloud of smoke inside of me at the thought of my father, the only person of blood I have left, distancing himself for me. Though, I know its for my own safety, I can't help but feel anger. Now, when I am going through a storm of things he decides to leave me all alone to deal with this mess I was thrust into? Why? Why can't he hold me like he use to when I was a child, afraid of the storms raging out in the district. Of watching kids who hated me wasted away into nothing during the winter and not being able to help in the least. "That's just the way things are Pearl," I can remember my father's quiet voice telling me as he patted my head as I hid underneath my blankets once when I was small, I can't remember why I was crying or even how old I was, but I can remember those sad words he uttered to me quietly.

"He's in his office, busy like usual. I swear he doesn't stop until one of the maids forces him to take a rest or eat something. I tell you, he's just working himself tired… Though, with your mothers passing and what not, its not surprising he's throwing himself into his work. It helps him to feel like he's helping, you know that child." Mable says with conviction, her eyes crinkling with a smile as she stares at me with affection. I nod mutely. My cheeks aching as I force the smile to stay in place on my face.

"Excuse me ma'am, Lucy's having a hard time with the place settings." A mousy looking tan girl, I recognize from school says quietly as she bows her head down as she speaks. She was three years ahead of me in school, and from the seam as well. Her grandmother April works for us and got her a steady job is well. We never talked or anything but anytime she has seen me she just ignores me politely, no doubt, pegging me as some stuck-up snotty townie.

Looking over to Finnick I give him a small smile then cock my head towards the stair, "want to go upstairs? I can give you a tour while we wait for my father and the celebration to start."

"Yeah that would be great, Pearl."

Giving Mable a last glance and smile before blindingly grabbing Finn's hand, I pull him towards the stairs and take then two at a time. Pulling him in my wake, I race to my room. The once familiar creaks of the stairs and hallways feel entirely too foreign and creak and groan underneath our feet as we race up the stairs at a swift pace, ignoring the displeased looks of some of the maids who watch us go.

On reaching my old room I yank the room open and pull Finnick in behind me, though I stop short over the threshold at seeing the very empty room, that I once use to know as my own. Behind me I hear the soft thud of the door being closed, but I don't turn around to look. My wide unseeing eyes flicker around the empty room as pain as heavy as lead weighs my chest down. I swallow trying to fight back the feeling of abandonment. Though, I had already known this was coming, I can't help but feel shattered still, as if I was taken by surprised. But I guess, somewhere deep inside I had longed for my father to prove me wrong, and he didn't. Feeling Finnick's burning gaze on my face I turn around and try to force a smile but the sad look in his eyes makes it drop as does my eyes to the pristine white carpet of my once room.

"Things aren't going to be the same, are they?" I whisper out in the deathly quiet room. My shoulders feel heavy with dread and fear, and yet the only real thing my heart can grasp is the desperate sorrow that fills it to the brim. I just want to go back to when I was foolish and naive, and mostly to when my mother was still alive. I just want my old life; the one where Katniss was my friend and Gale hated me, while Peeta and I admired the two hunters from the seam with sparkling eyes as they effortlessly ignored us. Or in my case, got constantly callously shoved down with Gale's burning words that always seemed to hit home with me, and that's probably because I was always unknowingly in love with him. Though, that is all ruined now. I have no idea what to do on this new ground I know stand on. No idea how to once again regain my footing or where to go once I get it.

"No. Things won't be the same ever again, Madge. But, I promise I won't let anything hurt you. I swear on my life I will keep you safe." Finnick replies sincerely, his eyes brimmed with unspoken determination and unwavering promise. For a second I feel my heart flutter from his kind words. My cheeks turn red as heat rises to them, and I find myself having to turn away from his strong gaze as I look out the window of my old bedroom, my eyes staring at the tree outside the window, watching as the slight wind rustled the leaves and branches.

"I know you will Finn… You've always been good at protecting what's important to you." I reply nonchalantly. My gaze travels back to him and I take notice of the deep pain and sorrow swimming in his green eyes. However, just as soon as he feels me staring he puts up a great poker face and beams at me.

"Yeah… You should get into something a little less-okay a lot less dirty."

Looking down at my dirty dress I can't help but snicker and this throws both of us into a fit of laughter. We laugh like this for awhile, until our sides start throbbing in protest then we just smile warmly at each other before Finnick gives me a gentle shove towards the bathroom door, which I know notice has a garment bag dangling off the back of the door. With a sinking feeling in my chest, I somberly walk over to it and without pausing yank it off the door then begrudgingly walk into the bathroom, making sure to close and lock the door behind me.

With a deep exhale I try to calm my racing heart, though with no avail. So instead I numbly undress then pull on the dress from the bag not pausing to look at myself in the mirror. I can feel from the material and slight breeze that this is something picked out from the Capitol, and no doubt from President Snow, himself. I feel sick just thinking about it. With a defeated sigh I exit the room and am met with Finnick, who is now wearing a dashing dark green tuxedo, a black bowtie, a white button up, and some shiny black dress shoe. He gives me a sad smile before taking a couple steps towards me then pulls me into his arms, and on being encased in his strong comforting and warm arms I can't help but breakdown in tears. Finnick hold me tightly to himself as he hold my head against his chest as the other one gently rubs at my back in a southing manor.

"It's going to be okay. Just let it all out, get it out as much as you can right now and then we have to be tough, okay? But, when you get back home after this parading party, you can cry as hard and long as you want. I'll be there to help you anyway I can. I know how you feel right now, it helps having someone to talk to, to help you try to rebuild this scary new life… I won't leave your side, Madge. You have me and I'm going to take care of you… I promise."

Finnick's words make me look up at his through blurry tear vailed eyes and smile weakly, "how are you so put together, after everything?" I wonder aloud, which causes him to grimace and avert his gaze to the window as I once had. "A lot of practice," he mumbles before running a hand through his hair as he extracts himself from me. With another beaming smile on his face he runs the pads of this thumbs under my eyes and dries the lingering tears then wraps an arm around my shoulders as he tows me out of the room and back down the hallway and stairs. On reaching the bottom of the stairs, Tessa Brooks walks up to us begrudgingly a sour look on her pretty, yet mousy face. "I'm supposed to help you with your hair and makeup, Ms. Undersee." She states, her thin lips form a forced smile as she's forced to deal with me. Probably because Mable is busy with Lucy. I can practically hear her screaming at herself for even going to tell Mable of Lucy's plight, now that she's left to deal with me.

Looking back at Finnick, we share a secret amused face. "I'll see you in a bit." I say, fighting back a laugh at Tessa's blatant displeasure of me. I have no idea why its so amusing to me, but it is. Maybe I have really lost my marbles. "Don't have too much fun." Finnick replies with good humor as I turn away from him and start following Tessa down the hallway, "I'll try. But, there may be no stopping it." I call over my shoulder at him, which causes him to chuckle and me to smile wider at him, then I turn around and quietly follow behind an annoyed Tessa, who leads me to the downstairs bathroom.

Gently yet forcefully, Tessa pushes me to sit down in the vanity chair as she hurriedly starts applying makeup to my face then fussing about with my hair. It feels like it takes her forever to get me looking presentable, but maybe that's because I'm so uncomfortable in her presence since she obviously dislikes me. Though, after what feels like hours upon hours, I'm finally given the okay, which comes from the scowl and the bitter mumble of, "all done. You're ready." Before she turns on her black flats and hastily leaves me alone in the bathroom. With a calming sigh, I slowly rise to my feet from the vanity chair then start my search for the comfortingly warm face of Finnick Odair.

Walking through the halls of my childhood home I can't help but swallow thickly as I see that important Capitol and town people as well as even family and some friends of Gale's have already arrived for the welcoming celebratory part, which makes my throat run dry with nerves of panic. I try to not make any eye contact with anyone as I continue down the halls, that is until I bump into my father, who looks just as uncomfortable as I feel. I swallow thickly then push a smile onto my lips as I stare back at him. "Father…" I find myself whispering out, my words lingering in the air shortly before being silenced by the loud chattering of the guests.

"Margaret, its nice to see you. You should head upstairs to make your entrance with Mr. Hawthorne." He states, his eyes looking off as if he can't hold my gaze. I feel a pang of sorrow, loneliness, and abandonment swirling violently in my chest leaving me ungodly cold and numb. "Okay." Is all I can mumble out as I let my eyes drop to the ground, trying to keep myself together while I watch my father turn and walk away from me, creating more of a hole in my already cracking heart. Taking a brief moment, I gather myself then set off for another awkward encounter with Gale Hawthorne.

As I head to meet up with Gale, I can't help but search for Finnick's reassuring face as I go, but with no avail. Though, I do see a lot of people, some which I know and others I don't. However, none that actually like me. But, I know somewhere out in the room there are Peeta, Delly, Finnick, Darius, Bannock, Mr. Mellark, and now Thom, who are cheering me on. Even if it is just a little bit.

Before I am ready I come face to face with Gale as I walk up the stairs. Awkwardly, I come to stand next to him, though leaving a decent amount of distance in between us. I can feel him look at me while I choose to stare at the chandelier that hangs over the foyer. My eyes, unseeingly trace over the gold of it, while not caring to really take in the detail of the Capitol masterpiece that effortlessly illuminates the foyer. I have no idea of what to say to Gale or even how to act. Everything I had thought between us was real turned out to be a complete lie, that everyone but me knew about. It's like a punch to my gut at having to spend any type of time with him after what he and Haymitch has done to me, but more so that I have to pretend that we're so happy in love even though Gale despises me and the small fact that he carelessly broke my heart without a slight hesitation.

I hear Gale take in a deep breath, no doubt preparing for some battle of words between us. However, before he can even utter a single word, the loud voice of my father presenting us makes its way up the staircase and to us. So with a forced smile, I'm becoming more accustom to, I elegantly tuck my hand into the bend of Gale's elbow and pull him with me gently towards the stairs then when he is through being taken back by my sudden touch, I see him swallow out of the corner of my eye before taking the lead as we descend the stairs to be once again put on display as the happy and in love victors.

On seeing us the crow grows rowdy with cheers of celebration. I can't help but feel completely detached from myself and alone. I use to have my family and a few friends to lean on, but now I felt like a leper, casted away like some trash as everyone I use to affiliate with stood at a distance from me. It's not hard to see the look of uncomfortable uncertainly, even in the faces of people who try to make an effort to talk to me as if I were something on the verge of attacking, if anyone so much as uttered the wrong words to me and I think that's what hurts the most.

My cheeks burn with pain from the forced smile but I don't falter it, instead I distract myself with the pain of my fingernails digging into my right palm as my left hand hold Gale's arm firm, yet loosely. My eyes scope the room as we descend the stairs until my gaze meets the vibrant green eyes of Finnick. His bright comforting smile instantly puts me at ease and immediately I feel the sting in my cheeks dissolve almost entirely as my smile becomes real.

Gale and I come to a standstill at the bottom of the steps and pose smiling as a few flashes from the Capitol cameras capture our pictures then once again we're on the move, but this time towards my father who is still keeping his gaze away from me, which slices through my heart with vengeance. I swallow down my sorrow willing to deal with it later when I'm alone in my large house tonight.

We come to stand at my fathers side as he gives his speech, of how happy he is of this years win for our district. Uninterestedly, I stare into the crowd at Finnick as my fathers voice grows further and further away from my ears. "You go this, Pearl." Finnick mouths to me with a bright and kind smile. Though his eyes are etched with pain, there is no doubt in me that I'll make him tell me why that is later. Letting my eyes stray from Finnick's safe comforting gaze my eyes sweep over the room and unexpectedly come to rest on Katniss. I feel anger boil up in me as I see the glowing look she sends Gale, pretty much drinking him in. How dare she be here with Peeta as she is, acting as if she is interested in him while pinning over Gale without any concern for Peeta to conceal it. I grit my teeth then quickly avert my eyes and feel a lump form in my throat as I feel my nerves welling up and the room to slightly waver and blur. I suck in a deep breath that almost immediately catches in my throat as I somehow see the bright cheerful face of River, his beaming smile, his green eyes, and that messy mop of sandy blond hair. I inadvertently start to shake not turning my eyes away from the sight, not even letting myself blink. With a small inaudible whimper I grasp Gale's hand tighter as I feel the blood leave my face. This can't be real. He can't be alive. I was there when he died, I had seen his void of any life. I find myself starting to take a step back but being forced to stop from being jerked back to my place by Gale's tight grasp on my hand. My eyes fly over to his and I'm met with a hard glare from him that quickly eases into a concern look but I don't pay any attention to it instead I blink and turn my gaze back to where I had thought I seen River. Standing there before me is in fact Rory Hawthorne. Dark brown hair and gray eyes stand where I had once seen blond and green. I feel like the air has been suck out of me and I can't be here any longer. I know I need to get out of here, to get somewhere to put myself back together once again. However, as more time goes by I'm starting to find it harder and harder to believe I actually will get better. I'm going to end up like Annie. Scared, shattered, and being paraded around for the Capitol and President Snow's entertainment. I just want to go to my house and hide underneath my covers until I wakeup from this nightmare that has become my reality.

Feeling myself slip down into the black darkness of my despair, I swiftly turn and once again lock eyes with Finnick, who can easily tell I'm barely holding myself together. "You're fine. You're safe." He mouths slowly to me, keeping his eyes locked on me, trying desperately to help keep me together until he can talk some sense back into me. I give him a faint nod and continue to stare at him to try and keep myself grounded in anyway I can.

The loud sound of applause makes me jump and quickly sweep my eyes around me and notice that my fathers speech is over. In a split second Gale releases my hand and walks towards his family and where a now entirely too excited Katniss waits for him. I watch him as he goes for a short while then turn and hurry over to Finnick, who swiftly pulls me into a tight embrace. "You're safe, Madge. I would never let anything happen to you. I promise, I'll protect you sweetie." Finnick whispers into my ear as he tightens his arms around me. I feel like I'm seconds away from crying and that I'm completely alone. "I seen him… I seen River… He was here, but he was Rory. What's happening to me Finn?" I whisper in despair. I hear Finnick take in a shaky breath then even more tighten his arms around me, "nothing, Madge. You're still my special little pearl. No on leaves the arena without having a part of them left behind… You just left a bigger part. You're just too goddamn nice and sincere of a person, you shouldn't have been made to go in there." He whispers for only me to hear. I relish in his kind words and soothing voice, letting it draw me into a comforting place in my mind as I squeeze my eyes shut tightly. I vaguely hear people talking around us but the only thing I'm capable of focusing on is Finnick keeping me centered. "How about we grab something to eat and something to drink?" Finnick suggests with a kind smile as he pulls back from me then drops his hand to wrap around my waist and steers me towards the large banquet tables of food and glasses of expensive Capitol champagne. With a still hazy mind I nod weakly and go along with him trying to ignore the looks of disgust I get from more than a few people. A low sigh of defeat leaves my lips as I duck my head and stare at my designer shoes wising I was anyone but me right now. That I could be some nameless person no one knew or even cared to acknowledge. To be invisible like I once was. Yeah, people would talk about me behind my back but for the most part I was left alone. Who would have thought I would miss being treated like that, but I guess it beats being treated like trash or something disgusting stuck on someone's shoe.

I subconsciously take the glass of champagne Finnick offers me and down the golden looking beverage in one go, effectively chilling my throat completely. Without thinking and just plainly wanting the vision of River out of my head I quickly grab another glass of champagne and down it in one go, my eyes water from the chilly alcohol. Finnick gives me a worried look as he smiles at me. Not say a word but still finding a way to comfort me as he gently takes my hand and gives it a quick squeeze before letting it go, probably not wanting any cheating rumors to swirl around Gale, Finnick, and myself, even if Gale and my relationship is totally fake. My heart twinges with heartache at the thought of Gale once again being out of my reach, but this time so much further.

I let my eyes wander shamelessly over to Gale and grit my teeth as I see him smiling warmly at Katniss as they talk in hushed tones while being too close for my comfort. I'm too entirely sober to deal with this. With thick swallow I force myself to look away before either one of them catches me staring at them then pick up another glass of champagne and drink it down and I keep this up until I feel completely and utterly numb of my senses. Smiling self-deprecatingly I let my eyes slide over the room taking in the occasional disgusted looks and glares I get. I wonder if I start counting now and go on to when the victory tour heads around all the dirty look I get how much it would add up to? A hundred, maybe a thousand, but who's to say. A laugh bubbles out of me and I glance over at Finnick as he silent observes me. "You should smile more, Finn. You look handsomer with a smile on your face." I say, giving him a friendly poke to his chest, which makes him shake his head in amusement and smile at me.

I see him look behind me then scowl then casually plaster on his famous victor smile and wrap an arm around my waist and pull me close to him before looking back at me, "we should get out of here, Pearl. Let's go back to your place, check out all that Capitol glamor." He puts forth with a forced air of calm that instantly I feel dread start to pool in my stomach. I know I'm about to see something I don't want to but I can't make my body listen to my mind, its like if has its own mind. Turning around I feel my heart break all over again. Gale stands close with Katniss in the shadows of the room, smiles on both of their faces. There faces are only a foot apart from one another. Gale twirls the end of Katniss' braid around his finger a delicate gaze on his face as he looks at her. I feel sick with the sight alone. One things for sure, I would rather be anywhere but here and Finnick must know that because in the next second he interlaces our hands and quickly pulls me out into the hall then out the front door of my fathers house. Mutely, I let him pull me down the now darkened street in the direction of the Victor Village.

We seem to arrive at my new large house in no time at all and for some odd reason, I'm thankful to be living alone. At least I can cry for as long as I want and no one will know. At least I can strip myself away from what people I did have in my life to keep them safe from any harm President Snow might send my way. At lease with just me for company, no one can hurt me like Gale keeps doing, no one can smash what is left of my heart. I know I have to be strong. I have to find some inner strength to get me through the rest of my long life as a victor. To not become attached to the people I will now mentor and watch them die in the games like I should have. Maybe that's why Haymitch didn't seem to want to help anyone before me. He didn't want them to have this fate, no one should have to go through what any of these victors have been made to go through.

Without missing a beat I rush past Finnick and drag him along with me up the front porch steps and into my house. When we make it inside, safe away from everyone's eyes behind the door I let go of his hand let myself slide down the door until I'm sitting on the ground with my face pointed down at the ground.

"He's an idiot, Madge. No need to get all hurt over some foolish guy ho can't see what's right in front of him." Finnick states, crouching down in front of me he rests his hand on my knee as to comfort me.

"I just want to go to sleep. I don't ant to think-to feel this. I just want to go to bed." I whisper out hoarsely, my eyes raising to meet his, pleading him to understand my wish. And the pained understanding look to his green eyes tells me he does. He nods his head then before I can move to stand up, he swiftly pucks me up and carries me upstairs to me room. Once there he sets me down on my feet at the edge of the bed. I give him a small forced smile then quickly tear off my dress, leaving me in my slip underneath then I crawl under the blankets, pulling them tightly around me. I hear Finnick leave the room and make his way downstairs, I had thought I wanted to be alone but no that I am, I don't want to be. I feel tears of loneliness and sorrow line my eyes threatening to leak over. But I know I have to be strong, for everyone who lost their lives in those stupid games. I have try and keep myself away from the veil of sorrow from falling over me. With a quivering lip I sink my teeth into the flesh of my bottom lip until I feel a sting and can taste the metallic taste of my blood. I turn over on my side and stare at the curtain covered window with unseeing eyes. I try to focus on the pattern of the curtains, t try to keep my head above the waves of despair that want to consume me whole.

The sound of feet running up the stairs has me bolting up into a sitting position, only to let out a whoosh of air as relieve seeps through me as I see Finnick walk towards me with a glass of water and a bottle of some pills. He sits down next to me and hands me the glass of water and quietly I take it, not looking away from him as I do so. I watch him uncap the pill bottle and pop out two pill tablets then hand them to me. I look at him with question but no less take them from him and pop them into my mouth and wash them down with a large couple gulps of water. "Those will help you get some good sleep. I figured you could need some, so I brought some here with me… You'll get a peaceful nights sleep with those babies, I promise. No scary dreams, no waking up. You'll sleep the whole night through, but you got to watch how often you take them. You don't want to become dependent on them, then he'll have another thing over your head to use against you." Finnick informs. He doesn't need to tell me who he is talking about because I know without a doubt in my mind that he's referring to President Snow. I nod at him then slide back down into bed and fix the blankets around me.

As Finnick moves to get up, a feeling of fear sweeps through me at the thought of being alone right now. Without a thought in my head I reach out and grab him hand, halting his departure. His curious gaze meets my pleading one. "Please don't leave… Just-just stay until I fall asleep. I-I, I just don't want to be alone right now. Please stay with me Finn." I practically beg in a hushed voice. With a searching look to my face he nods in compliancy and toes off his shoes before crawling under the blankets with me. In a swift movement he turns me towards him, letting me rest my head against his chest, my ear pressed right over where his heart resides. I feel his fingers start to comb through my hair gingerly and I close my eyes. "Just pay attention to the beating and you'll drift off in no time, pearl." He breaths out into the still room, his voice sounds louder than it actually is in the still room. I don't respond to him as I feel myself becoming more relaxed and then I drift off into sleep.


	2. Chapter 2: Difficult Outcomes

**_*Author Note- Sorry for the delay in uploading this chapter, but for some reason it wouldn't let me upload if for a few days. I hope you guys enjoy it. please forgive any errors. -007twihunger xoxo_**

 ** _Chapter Two:_** ** _Difficult Outcomes._**

When I awake it's to a new day. I feel completely renewed and rested. Stretching my body I squeeze my eyes shut savoring in the comfortable popping of my joints. The feel of a hand gently caressing my back, I can't help but snap my eyes open and let loose a shriek as the angry face of Cato flashes in my mind. In seconds, I fling myself off the bed and crawl backwards away from the bed only to stop as my wide fearful eyes land on a very awake and worried looking Finnick. I swallow a few times. My heart thumps erratically in my chest as I continue to look at him.

"I-I just… I thought you were him-were Cato. I don't know…" I say trailing off shaking my head slightly as I go quiet.

He watches me with calculative eyes as he grits his teeth then he slowly gets out of bed and walks over to me. With a concern etched face he crouches down and sits down in front of me, leaving a slight distance between us, no doubt worried I might freak out from him touching me again. "He's dead Madge, long gone. He can't ever touch you again. I won't let that type of thing ever happen to you again, not even a might. I swear if someone tries that I'll kill them and take whatever Snow throws at me. I'm not afraid to get hurt or used, but I won't ever let you be hurt like that again, okay? You can trust me. I'm your buddy Finn." He gets out in slow precise words, his eyes not diverting from me and instantly I feel at ease and foolish all at once. I can't even believe how my head when there. Of why I would ever misplace Finnick with Cato. I know he would never hurt me for as long as he lived, we're friends.

Nodding I let my eyes flicker down to my sheet covered lower body and start twisting the white fabric in my hands. "I know that. Of course I know that, I just-I don't know why I even thought about him. I really don't, I'm sorry, Finn." I make known before hesitantly meeting his gaze once again.

With a gentle smile he shakes his head then ruffles my bedhead, "there is nothing for you to apologize for. You haven't done anything wrong, besides that's to be expected from what you endured. I should be apologizing to you, for the lack of thinking. I should have been thinking more clearly. I'm truly, very sorry Pearl. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Of course I can, Finn. But, you really don't need to apologize to me either… Can't we just erase all that and pretend that it didn't happen and start a fresh and happy day?"

"Okay, we can do that. Fresh and happy day starting now, so ease up."

I laugh for the first time today and stick my tongue at my friend who snorts with amusement then effortlessly shoves me over and gets to his feet hurriedly then rushing out the door. "Last one to the kitchen has to make breakfast." He throws over his shoulder continuing to run for the victory line marked as the kitchen.

"You're a big cheater!" I holler as I chase after him, the whole time we both laugh loudly and with abandon.

Like I expect, I am the 'lucky loser' how Finnick put it. We idly chat as I fix breakfast of scrambled eggs, some bacon, sausage, some fruit, biscuits, and gravy. Which Finnick makes a fuss over being too much, but honestly it helps clear my mind if I'm busy doing something so what if I decide to start making a feast for every meal. At least it will buy me some calm solitude in my hectic racing mind.

Smiling at one another we sit across from each other and eat our breakfast in a comfortable silence, the light pitter patter of rain against the window as a nice background noise. My mind is still swirling with dark looming thoughts but being with Finnick seems to help with it. It allows me to push it to the back burner of my mind and focus on the here and now.

"It's nice having breakfast with someone for a change." I state offhandedly. Spearing a fluff of egg onto my fork then popping it into my mouth. I know that the food tastes good from the look on Finnick's face. However, to me it has no taste, probably a side effect of my depression.

Locking eyes with Finnick I see a brief glimpse of pain before he contorts his face to that of his mask making me feel slightly hurt from this gesture. "Yeah it is." He replies.

"So, why are you here Finn? I mean, not that I am not happy that you're here. You know I love to have you around, its actually really nice, especially with everything going on." I make known giving him an appreciative smile, which he thankfully returns though I do note that is a weak smile, but a smile none the less.

"I'll fill you in later, I promise you Madge that I will tell you later."

"Okay, as long as you'll let me know, that's all that really maters. So what are your plans for today?"

"Well, I planned on taking you out and about to finish getting my tour then maybe buy some things to make you an awesome District Four themed dinner. But we can add in some fillers throughout the day. Really, I'm up to whatever you want to do Madge, as long as we get to spend some time together."

His words make me feel warm with glee and I can't help but smile in return. "Sounds like a plan Mr. Odair." We both get back to eating our food and when they are clear of food, Finnick helps me clean up the kitchen. We put up the leftovers as well as do the dishes, I wash while Finnick dries and puts them away. When we're finished cleaning, we both head in our own directions to get dressed.

I turn at every angle and look at myself in the mirror, taking in the pale blue dress that I have on, silently thanking the gods that the hem of the dress is just an inch above my knees. My fingers lightly fiddle with the ties on my elbow length sleeves and quickly fix them into bows. I pair my outfit with a pair of light brown ankle booties, with a pale blue ribbon that I braid into my hair. Delicately I put in a pair of stud earrings then let out a light sigh, looking at myself I look the same but inside I feel completely different. Forcing a smile at my reflection, I quickly apply some makeup to take away from my washed out pale completion. After I'm done, I send a last glance at myself then hurry downstairs to meet Finnick, who is already waiting for me with his trademark grin. He's wearing a white cable knitted cardigan that clips close with a silver clasp over his left bicep, showing the white t-shirt underneath it. The white cardigan and shirt pair well with his dark blue jeans and his black boots.

"You're looking sharp, Finn." I say knocking my shoulder with his as he opens the door and offers me his arm. Smiling at him I hook my arm through his and grasp his arm tightly as I let him lead me out of my house. I don't bother locking the front door just close the door behind us, if someone wants to steal from me their welcome to. I can't force myself to care about it.

"Why thank you. You're looking pretty snazzy yourself, Pearl. So where do we go first, tour guide?" He asks looking over to me and leads me down the steps of my porch.

I smile at him gently and open my mouth to respond as I let my eyes gaze around the victor village then snap my mouth closed as I see Gale and Katniss sitting with their shoulders touching on the top step of his porch. My heart aches with hurt and longing at I stare at him. I don't realize I have stopped walking until Finnick gives a soft tug on my chin to force me to look at him, "don't let him make you tear down your walls and go to that painful isolation, Pearl. It takes a hundred times longer to put yourself together than it does to let yourself crumble to the ground." Finnick says softly. His green eyes stare into my eyes as he furrows his eyebrows with concern. I give him a jerky nod then look back over at Gale's house, which I now know is directly across the street from my own. When my eyes make it back over to him I want to die, seeing as he stares at me, its not with confusion or friendliness. No, its with anger. His face screws up into a hard glare. Next to him, Katniss gives me a brief look of disgust before turning her gaze back to Gale. I watch unwillingly as she says something to him and how his face loosens into a smile as he turns his eyes towards his hunting partner and my heart aches even more. I feel a sob crawl at my throat but with a gritted teeth and a constricting grip on Finnick's arm I pull him with me back into a slight speed walk towards town.

After walking for a short while, I give Finnick a slight glance then look back at the dirt road in front of us. "We should head over to the meadow. Its really pretty. There are usually little purple and blue flowers everywhere, and the grass is so green. Not to mention that there is a great view of the forest outside of the districts fence." I numbly mumble out to my friend. Silently, I try to grasp ahold of myself before I slip back into my sadness. And, with Finnick's comforting free hand rubs gently at the back of my hand that hold his arm tightly I find it easier than when I was by myself on the train. Out of the corner of my eye I see Finn give a soft nod and remain silent.

Walking into town we're immediately pelleted with harsh glares and looks off disgust as people mumble lowly to one another about us. I force a smile and know without a doubt so dose Finnick. We steadily make our way through town then into the meadow. Reaching my favorite spot by a tree near the fence I pull Finnick to a stop then down to sit on the ground with me. We sit next to each other in silence just staring out at the woods through the fence. The light breeze blows around us making a few loose strands of my hair whip around in the air. The soft thrumming sound of the fence is the only sound wrapped around us, telling us its alive with electricity. The grass under us feels slightly damp to the touch but neither of us mind, this is nothing to us compared to our horrible lives.

Not wanting to sit in silence anymore, I clear my throat then lick my lips and turn my head to look at Finn. He looks straight ahead with a far off look to his a foam green eyes. His blond hair artistically shakes with the gentle breeze, and I feel lost of what he might be thinking, let alone be feeling.

"So how is Annie doing? I hope well. I can't wait to see her when the tour rolls around. At least I have that to look forward to. It won't be incredibly fun but at least I get to see a few of my friends from the other districts… Well just mainly you, Mags, Annie, Johanna, Seeder, and Chaff, really." I blabber on. At my words Finnick seems to go ridged and his face tenses. He swallow thickly then sucks in a deep breath before squaring away his emotions once more and I'm left feeling very concern for him.

"Let's not talk about that right now. So are you happy to be out of school?" Finnick says, effortlessly changing the conversation. I stay quiet for a short while, letting my eyes trail over his handsome face then try to search his guarded eyes but with no avail.

"Uh, yeah, its nice I guess. I didn't really mind school though, if I'm being honest. I did well in it."

"Of course you would. You're a smart girl."

"But, I am glad to be away from people talking about me behind my back… Well I guess they will still do that. Huh?"

"Yeah, people will always do that though. It happens to the best of us and the worst of us. Back home, they all love to discuss what a sell out I am. That I hop around beds, its quite funny some of the stories they tell." He says with a smile, though I notice it doesn't reach his eyes. He shrug his shoulder then glances at me, "they might start talking about us, you know. Even that district partner of yours, people love to tear other people down. I guess it makes them feel good about their miniscule lives."

"Who cares? I've had enough of caring about what people think of me. They can say what they want to. We know what's going on and what's not going on, and that's all that matters, right?"

"And what about Gale, do you care what he think? About what he'll say about us being so friendly with one another? He might start saying you're the same as me." Finnick questions, his eyes pierce me straight through and I have to look down at my lap. "I just want to make sure your ready for what they will be saying… What he will be saying. I don't want you to get hurt by some idiots words, who doesn't know a thing he's spouting off about. I want you to stay the smiling Madge that I know. I want you to be happy and safe."

With my free hand I pluck up a blue flower that is missing a few petals and twist it between my thumb and pointer finger. My eyes staring intently at the action as I think his words over, biting at my inner lip, I know he's right that I'll be crushed with every word Gale slings at me. I know that he as well as other people will be saying I've ditched him and moved on with Finnick. "He can't say anything. We're not doing anything wrong, and besides he's off parading in front of me with Katniss. He can fuck off. He told me he didn't-he can keep to himself with his new girlfriend and I'll stay in my house until the tour then I'll plaster on a smile like I'm supposed to and before I know it, it will all start to get easier…" I say limply and trail off.

I don't notice I'm crying until I feel a tear roll down my throat and absorb into the collar of my dress. Finnick's thumb wipes away my tears but they are swiftly replaced by new ones. Lifting my head I meet his gaze head on and feel my lip begin to quiver. "Why is it her and not me?" I question, knowing full well that he won't have a response. He looks at me with such sorrow that I know he can feel my pain. Slowly he starts to shake his head, "I don't know Madge, but he's a fool for doing so. I would chose you hands down next to her, next to practically everyone." He states wiping another round of tears away.

Forcing away my sorrow I flick the flower away from me and greedily suck in a breath of air to calm myself, hating for being this weak. "Yeah, besides Annie," I joke trying to help lighten the mood but this has the opposite effect. Finnick drops his eyes to his boots then gazes up at the sky before finally looking at me again, "no… I picked you over her." He informs lowly. His words are said in a detached voice but his eyes are filled with anguish. I have a terrible feeling in my gut at just the sight of this. "Finn, what do you mean?" I try to ask only for my words to get swept into the air as I watch as he turns away from me again. With a clearing of his throat Finnick hops up to his feet and drags me up along side him. He pulls my hand free from his arm and intertwines our fingers, holding onto my hand tightly.

"We should head over to the jewelers, I wanted to have a look around."

"Alright-sure, yeah, if that's what you want to do."

"It is. Then we can go over to your fathers office-uh, there should be a package there waiting for me, well you."

Finnick walks at a slow pace with me, his eyes staring straight ahead. His face lit with a smile and his words alive with character but his eyes are dull and sorrow filled. On noticing my eyes on him, he turns his head slightly towards me then smiles and squeezes my hand. His eyes don't linger on me and instead flash back in front of us. "I also wanted to head over to that Hob place. Haymitch was telling me about it, I need to pick up some liquor. Then we can pick up some groceries for that dinner I owe you." He cheerily say, his eyes once again becoming that of his guarded façade.

"Okay. Whatever you want to do, you're my guest after all." I reply, trying to put the same sound into my own words. Though, he isn't opening up to me about what ever is troubling me now, doesn't mean he won't. This can just be a helping shove of brushing up on my own mask of concealment façade. "I've never been to the Hob so you'll have to be the one showing me around there."

We both chuckle lightly, ignoring the looks we get as we make our way through town and towards the shops. The whole time we walk we hold hands tightly, both of us may be cracked but we're doing everything in our power to stay intact and using the other one for support.

Silently we head around to the shops Finnick wants to visit then head towards the mayors office, where we not too surprisingly run into Darius. He smiles warmly at me and rises an eyebrow in question as his eyes dart down to Finnick and my intertwined finger. Though, he doesn't say a thing and I appreciate this wholly.

"What are the two of you up to?" He asks, tucking his helmet under his arm. A dimpled grin directed at the both of us. "Shopping, I would have to guess from the bags."

"Yeah, we were actually heading to my fathers office to pick up some package… Actually, Darius, would you be a dear and take this and that package to my house? We have a few other stops to make and it would really help us out." I say with pleading eyes that makes Darius laugh and shake his head. "Yeah, but you owe me a lunch date-a catch up meal really." He puts forth, taking the bags from Finnick and me. "Thank you so much, Darius. You're a lifesaver. The front door is open." I say brightly to Darius who just grins at me kindly. With a last smile towards me and a wave Darius heads up the steps of the Justice building.

"Shall we?" I question glancing over at a smiling Finnick, who nods and tugs be back down the road in the opposite direction to town and more near the seam. While we walk I can't help but think about how things have changed so drastically in my life. At one moment I had thought Gale and I really stood a chance of being something, of being together as a couple. But that blew up in my face and now once again I am alone, well more alone than I have ever been, save for the very few people who still care enough about me to associate with me.

The hob is housed in an old corroded coal warehouse. It is bustling with all types of people. Though, most of them are people from the seam. I try to keep my gaze lowered so as not to meet anyone's gaze and to avoid any ugly words slung at me. Finnick holds my hand tightly but somehow gently in his own. His eyes rank around the hob until they light up a fraction as he spots a shop stall and pulls me towards it. "How much liquor do you plan on buying, Finn?" I question from slightly behind him. He throws me a quick glance then looks where he is walking. "I don't know. But, enough to keep me sane, I guess." He puts forth in a joining manor, though I know its anything but that.

I feel like lead has dropped into my stomach. If someone so put together and strong like Finnick has to resort to this means of getting by from day to day, then what hope do I have to make it through without medicating myself? I lick my lips and briefly gaze around the near shopping stalls and can't help but let a smile tough my lips as I see a box full of music sheets. I look back and forth from Finnick and the box before giving his hand a squeeze and causing him to look at me with questioning green eyes. "Would you mind if I went across the way and looked at the music sheets while you buy the liquor?" I ask with eyes brimming with hope. He gives me a kind gaze and nods, "just make sure you don't go too far from me. I don't want to loose sight of you. And remember to be safe, Pearl." He replies kindly making me beam at him happily. I throw my arms around his neck and hug him tight to my person then I release him with a wide smile and hurry over to the stall I have my sights set on.

The old and weathered pages feel like home underneath my delicate tough, I can't help but smile to myself as I gingerly leaf through them, trying to find anything of interest that I don't already own. In the end I come up to three scores that I have always cherished that I swiftly purchase them with a bright smile on my face, even as Rooba, the stall owner looked at me with disgust and discomfort. With a heavy and unsettling feeling I keep my fake smile on my lips and turn around only to come smack dab into Gale's sturdy chest. With a shock of pain from remembering the way he rejected me as well as the way he was so cozy and cuddled up with Katniss not even that long after chucking me to the side without a single kind look in my direction, I take a step back from him and look at him with uncertainty. We look at each other in disbelief and an eerie uncomfortableness spreads between the two of us.

"What are you doing here, Undersee?" Gale asks in a gruff slightly held back angered voice that makes my words catch in my throat.

I can't help from looking over his shoulder, where Finnick stands gathering an arm full of different kinds of liquor. Gale follows my gaze then glares even harder at me. "You sure do cozy up quickly, don't you? I knew you were a Capitol girl through and through, but I never took you for a girl who would try and seduce the first victor to show you so much as a smile."

His words make me want to scream and cry, and possibly scratch his eyes out. How dare he say such things to me, does he not realize how much he's already destroyed me with his rejection? With the way he parades around town with Katniss? Doesn't he understand it kills me? I feel tears waver in my eyes as I gaze up into his aflame eyes, and all that I can see is unadulterated anger and its all targeted at me.

"What are you-how could you say-what the fuck is wrong with you Gale?" I demand in a low choking voice, barely containing my tears and sorrow.

Gael lets out a sarcastic laugh then takes a step towards me and forces me to look even further up at his from the close proximity. "Oh, stop the act Madge. I know you're not like Katniss and me. You're just one of them, one of the dirty few who toy around with anything and everything. You're just like that tramp Odair. You know, you had me for a few minutes thinking you were someone I could trust, someone I could get along with. But, obviously I was mistaken. You're just as bad as Snow, if not worse. At least we all know what he is, while you pretend to be something you most certainly aren't. I thought I could trust you… That we were… That we were friends, and then this." Gale seethes, his molten gray eyes burn me from the outside in. "I though at first I might have miss judged you, but I guess I was slightly off, you're not the kind nice girl you pretend to be. No, you're just some Capitol slut who opens her legs for anyone who can help her in her time of need. You know, we're supposed to be in love right? And yet, here you are strutting unashamedly around with that tool Odair, flaunting yourselves. What do you think this could do to us? This could very well get us killed or worse from Snow. Why don't you try to use the last brain cells you have to actually do something right for once princess."

His words tear a large hole into my already broke heart. I stare at him unblinkingly, scare if I do blink my tears will fall. An uncontrollable sarcastic laugh bubbles out of me gaining a the few peoples attentions. But I pay them no attention as I feel anger boil over inside of me from everything happening in my life and the only person in my target sights is standing right in front of me, an angry looking Gale Hawthorne. I stab a finger into his chest, "how fucking dare you! You're a piece of work Hawthorne. Remind me who ran off into Katniss' arms as soon as we got here, huh? Oh, that's right, it was you! Not fucking me! I was once again pushed to the side just like before even though this time we're supposed to be a team, so don't give me that shit. Finnick is my friend, unlike you and Katniss. He's helping me since I'm all alone in that big fucking house. My mothers dead and my father doesn't want anything else to do with me, so please excuse me if I want to spend time with my friend so I'm not dwelling on the fact that I killed people. That I watched my friends die and I couldn't do a thing… That the one boy who I always cared about just tossed me to the side like a piece of trash and went right back to treating me like the scum of the earth. I didn't ask for any of this, Gale. I didn't! If I could have chosen anything it would have been to never leave that fucking game!" I snarl at him. Through my anger I'm well aware that tears are openly flowing down my face. However, I can't find it in me to care, all these people already seen me cry while in the Hunger Games so who should I care now? If I want to blubber in a ditch then that's one me.

I watch as guilt sweeps through Gale's eyes as he stares at me before dropping his gaze to our shoes. I wait for him to respond as I pant trying to calm down my anger. I can feel eyes all around us watching this scene take place, no doubt thinking this is some type of lover spat. I want to laugh. If only Gale could love me then maybe something in my life wouldn't be so hard to bare.

After a while Gale clears his throat and raises his eyes to look back into mine. I can read as clear as day as uncertainty filters over his face and in his haunting eyes. He looks slightly lost. He licks his lips and swallows as his hand comes up and rubs at the back of his neck, out of nervousness. And just as he opens his mouth a small olive tanned hand reaches out and grasps his arm, forcing him to turn away from me and towards an uncomfortable looking Katniss, who doesn't even spare me a glace.

"I was looking all over for you. Lets go, come on Gale." She says giving his arm a tug, trying to pull him away from me.

Gale's face snaps back over at me and guilt brims his eyes. A self-deprecating chuckle falls loose from my lips as I shake my head, not looking away from his eyes. "Yeah, Gale, why don't you do what you always do and go running when she calls." I say. I don't give him the chance to hurt my heart even further by him turning away and following after Katniss, instead I turn on my heels and stomp over to Finnick, who looks at me with confusion before spotting the pair of seam kids behind me then with a smile he wraps his arm around my shoulders and leads me out of the hob in a comfortable silence.

We continue to walk in silence for a while, until we're alone and reach the path leading away from town and towards the Victor Village, then Finnick gives me a short look, "what did he say to you, Pearl? And, don't you dare even think about saying nothing, you were crying and you don't cry over nothing." He asks lowly, his words mingling in with the low howling of the wind around us. I bite at my bottom lip as I stare unseeingly ahead, quietly mulling over his words.

"We both said some pretty heated things, but its nothing to worry about. Everything is fine, Finn. Don't worry about it, just enjoy your visit." I reply.

Finnick gives me a hard look before letting loose a sigh of defeat then he gathers me into a quick hug, "Don't try to just burden yourself, Madge. I will always run to help you." He says with a stern look making me fell down as well as comforted.

"I know, and I appreciate that whole heartedly, Finn. But, really I'm fine. He was just saying things to get me upset, as was I. We're fine though. I'm sure everything will go back to normal before a blink of an eye." I say with a forced smile just as we're rounding into the victor village.

I can tell Finnick has a lot more to say about the subject, but before he can get into it we're approached by a cheery looking Hazel Hawthorne. Finnick and I briefly exchange a look of confusion before she approaches us. I have little time to force on my smile and instead look at her with tight lipped confusion.

"How are you doing Madge? I hope well. The kids and I were wondering if we could ask you to dinner, in thanks for everything you've done for our family. And of course your friend is invited as well" Hazel says, giving a brief look to Rory and Posy. I can't help but smile at her words, ignoring the nagging feeling of discomfort that they are Gale's family.

Looking down and at the three small Hawthorne children, pulls at my heart strings and I can only nod in confirmation. Hazel beams at me and quickly sweeps me into a loving hug that leaves me wanting even more happy familiar contact, but knowing it won't happen anytime soon.

"Umm….of course, why shouldn't we." I say with a bright smile as Finnick gazes at me with a vailed confusion. Gale's not here so we should be fine. We should be well gone before Gale gets home.

Hazel and the kids beam happily at us and then Posy grabs my hand tightly and pulls me towards their house, I follow along with a forced smile trying to appease the four year-old as much as I can. Posy easily pulls me across the road and into Gale's house then up the flight of stairs that mirrors my own. With a beaming smile she leads me into a purple and pink room that causes me to smile as well.

"Can you put that ribbon you gave me into my hair?" She questions in delight as she scurry's over to a side table and quickly races back to me with a pink ribbon in her small hand, the same one I gave her. I can't help but smile back at the small girl and nod while crouching down until I am sitting on the pristine white carpet of her room.

With a beaming grin, Posy sits down in front of me and with deft fingers I work the pink ribbon into her dark and beautiful hair, all the while wishing I had a cute and absorbing little sister as her. I smile to myself as my fingers work on there own accord, until her hair is carefully placed into a fishtail that hangs between her shoulder blades. Her black hair feels like velvet to my nimble fingers. I wish I had a little sister like her.

After I am done with her hair Posy quickly rises to her feet them pulls me over to a trunk with a few toys in it. She pulls out two dolls, one with black hair and the other with blond hair. She hands me the blond haired one, but before we can start up a game, Hazel calls up to us, "dinners ready girls." Posy puffs up her cheeks then let out a huff and intertwine her tiny fingers through mine and leads me back downstairs. I see Rory, Vic, and Finnick already settled at the table and Posy and I follow suit. Posy sits in between Rory and me while I sit in between Finnick and an empty chair, that I can only guess is Gale's. Settling into my seat I watch as the siblings bicker with one another filling my heart with warmth. I continue to watch them in silence as the siblings all chatter between the three of them and occasionally laugh heartily. The food splayed across the table is everything I had hope would come from a family. Many delicious dishes that are piled high and yet, I'm not hungry at all. But I still force down the food with a polite and soft smile gracing my lips.

I can't help but wish this was how dinner was at my house growing up, before the games. But, my mother was sick and my father was always working, I guess somethings will never change with him.

Through the opened curtains of the living rooms front window, I take note of the darkening sky, knowing Finn and I will have to make our departure soon. I prepare myself from pushing my chair back from the table and standing up then pulling Finnick behind me to my new house, where I might finally get him to tell me what's going on now. However, before I can even make a move to scoot my chair back, Mrs. Hawthorne swiftly waltzes out of the room then returns a few seconds later carrying a silver serving tray that is holding six saucers with a slice of blackberry cobbler on them. Not wanting to be rude I remain sitting, though I do start to chew uneasily at the inside of my cheek.

The cobbler tastes as good as it looks nonetheless, it does nothing from hindering my desire to leave the Hawthorne home. I have a rising fear that we might just run into Gale if we stay any longer. This whole thing was a big mistake on my part. I should of made up some polite excuse instead intrude into Gale's home. I know he will be infuriated with me if he finds me here, let alone find Finnick with me as well. I swallow thickly just thinking about that outcome, while I begin to eat my dessert at a faster pace. Though, that proves to be harder than I intend it to be, with my dry feeling throat.

I am half way through with my slice of cobbler when the front door opens then closes and is followed closely by light footsteps, heading our way. Out of prickled fear, I unknowingly drop my fork and gaze with wide terror filled eyes at the doorway just as Gale walks into the room. The warm smile on his lips leaves the very instant he sets his eyes on me, then they fly over to Finnick before back again. I can easily read the anger on his face and this alone causes a cold sweat to breakout on the back of my neck and palms. Rubbing my hands against my cloth covered thighs.

"Gale, honey, you're late. Your food is in the fridge, just heat it up and come join us, Mr. Odair, here was just telling us such a fascinating story about-" Hazel starts but is cut off as Gale stomps over to me and effortlessly jerks me up from my seat then his hands drops away from me as he glares. "What the hell Undersee! What are you and lover boy doing in my house? You're most definitely not wanted here, townie!" He snarls, his hands hand shaking at his sides making his anger known.

I awkwardly clear my throat and fight against myself from looking back at Finnick for help, instead I stand dumbfounded in front of Gale, not knowing what to do.

"Gale Asher Hawthorne!" His mother chastises him with a scrape of her chair, no doubt form her suddenly standing up from behind me.

"Don't talk to her like that Gale! You big, stupid jerk," Rory adds on.

He pays them no mind then quickly grabs a hold of my shoulders and gives me a slight shake that startles me. He leans closer to me so his faces is at the same height as mine. "Answer me!" He demands through gritted teeth.

"We…we were just leaving, honestly-it…we…we didn't mean any harm. I'm sorry we intruded in your home." I breath out quietly for only him to hear, not wanting to cause another useless altercation, gods know I won't be able to go through another one so soon, especially with what he said to me last time.

Gale lets out a sarcastic chuckle then gives me a light shove back from him, like he's disgusted from even having to touch me. And since I'm not prepared fro this, I accidently trip over my own shoe and fall backwards into the cupboard to my right. I hit it roughly with a resounding thud that leaves me with a slightly throbbing head, but I pay it no mind as I watch in fear as Finnick flies form his seat and grips Gale by his shirt collar, all facade of the Capitol made man is gone and he looks livid.

"You don't fucking lay a hand on a woman, let alone her. Do you understand me, boy?" Finnick grits out pulling Gale closer to him.

I want to say something but I'm still shocked and my head is filled with a state of daze. I grimace as I push myself up into a sitting position, readying myself to stand back up and to tow Finn with me back to my house. However, before I can another sound of a chair scraping against the floor meets my ears then is followed closely by hurried foot steps towards me. Looking over to the noise I take in a fearful looking Rory. "Oh my god, Madge, you're bleeding. Are you okay?" Rory says in a rush, his eyes filled with worry for me.

Feeling confused, I furrow my brows and finally take notice to the wet trail from the side of my head that leads down into the right collar of my dress. I don't know what to feel as I take in the sight of the blood. Though, I can't find it in me to be mad at Gale, knowing he would never hurt me like that and understanding that this was a complete accident.

I feel everyone's focus switch to me at Rory's words as well as feel a soft cloth be pressed against where the small trail of blood is leaking out of by Rory. A wave of embarrassment swirls in me and makes me want to leave even further.

Gently I push Rory's hand away from me and faintly smile at him as I get to my feet with shaky legs. "Thanks." I mumble out to Rory, not daring to look at him or any one else in the room. "I…I-um, I'm going to head home. It's late… Thank you for the lovely meal and for your warm hospitality. And I am greatly sorry for the disturbance I have caused-ugh, bye."

Keeping my eyes on the ground I make my way out of the dining room and through the hall only to stop as a calloused hand wraps around my wrist and stops me. I don't need to look to know its Gale, and I honestly don't want to look at him right now. I would rather go home and lick my wounds in peace.

"Madge…are-I'm so sorry." He makes known. His voice laced with nothing but sincerity.

Nodding my head I stare at the ground. "Yeah, I know. Don't worry about it. Sorry for intruding." I state in a monotone as I pull my wrist free from his grasp then once again I start walking, thought this time my steps are filled with more haste to leave this house.

With heavy steps I walk the short, yet log seeming distance from the Hawthorne's house to mine. The sound of footsteps behind me can only belong to Finnick so I don't bother to turn around in the least.

On entering my house, I immediately rush over to the bags laying on top of the dinner table. I only have to rummage around in the bags for a few seconds before my fingers come in contact with an unmistakable glass bottle of liquor. Grasping my hand around it, I pull it free. With a quick uncapping of the bottle I rise it to my lips, but before my tongue can taste the heavenly nectar of numbness the bottle of liquor is snatched from my hand. Turning, I scowl at Finnick, who holds my bottle of liquor hostage-well I guess truthfully it is his but that doesn't matter to me at the moment- Finnick looks at me with restrained concern.

"You need to let me take care of this wound." Finnick says, in a contained tone as his eyes search through mine.

"I'm fine. I just want to drink to numb my pain." I put forth as I continue to scowl at him, my hand reaching out to grab the bottle back only for him to hold it further away from me. "Please, Finn. Just let me have this. Everything in my life is shit at the moment and I jut want to forget about all this hectic stuff happening in my life."

Finnick looks at me with guilt filled green eyes. "At least let me treat you while you wallow away in booze."

"Fine, be my guest."

With a contained smile of grief, he gently pushes me down onto a stool then relents as I once again snatch up the bottle of liquor as I watch him heads off to retrieve the first aide kit and began to fix up my wound. Pressing the hard lip of the bottle to my lips I greedily drink the liquor. The cold alcohol that burns icily going down against my throat makes my eyes water.

Sitting on the plush gold couch in my living room, I let my eyes float around the room, for the first time letting them take in my new home. The walls are tall and the ceiling is high, and both are a rich pristine white that makes me feel very uncomfortable, completely too perfect for my liking but lovely in all sense.

Toeing off my shoes, I grin to myself as I squish my toes into the exquisite white carpet. The comforting softness of it makes me feel light, almost careless if I can just forget about my predicament of my life. Of the fact that I am a victor and now in the watchful eye of President Snow. I feel tears of sorrow prick my eyes and a billowing deep pain sets into my chest. No matter how hard I try I will never be good enough for Gale, I will never be the one who holds his heart. Not wanting to feel the pain and sorrow anymore, I quickly yank the bottle back up to my lips and take a large pull from the bottle, savoring the warm feeling the liquor leaves me with.

My eyes slowly travel up to the ceiling just as Finnick returns to the room with a first aide kit in hand. Silently he pulls a chair over in front of me then sits down before wordlessly getting to work on fixing my no doubt small wound. I wince slightly at the stinging of the medical ointment he applies to the side of my head. A bubbling laugh bursts out of me and I can't stop the grin that spreads across my lips. What a fickle thing life is. So confined and tightly restrained by the Capitol and President Snow.

Feeling his eyes on, I reluctantly turn to return his gaze. "What are you doing here, Finn?" I question, my eyebrows furrowing with confusion.

Licking his lips he shakes his head with suck deathly consuming sadness that I can even feel it. I press my lips together to contain myself from forcing whatever is troubling him out of him, 'he will come to me when he feels like it.' I think knotting my fingers around the neck of the bottle. With a self-deprecating laugh Finnick leans back from me and looks to the ceiling with self loathing. "They killed her." He finally states then with an almost animalistic air to him he jerks the bottle from my hands then quickly starts to chug it.

I'm not sure by what he means so I just stay silent and wait for him to go into more detail about what he's talking about. After a few moments he pulls the bottles lip away from his mouth and gasps for air, his sea foam green eyes now pointed down at the ground in despair. Mutely he held out the bottle back out to me, which I gladly took and proceed to gulp down the warming liquor before passing it back to him. With his pointer finger he traces his finger around the rim of the bottle his eyes watching the motion intently.

"I crossed the line with Snow by telling you of your mothers death and he killed her. He killed Annie, because I chose you. I chose to tell you she had died he killed poor sweet Annie… I killed her, Madge. I killed Annie."

"No! You didn't do a thing. He did, Snow chose to do that. He's the one who killed her. You were just being the sweet Finnick, I know and let me know of what was going on out in the world…Finn…I-oh god, I'm so sorry. I killed her didn't I? I killed the one woman you loved…I killed her."

A sob strangles in my throat as I swiftly yank the bottle back away from him and continue to drink as much as my lungs will allow me to down before demanding air from me. My shoulders shake and I grit my teeth thinking about the sweet fragile girl with the flaming red hair and cute freckles. The girl I had called my friend, the one who didn't belong in this cut throat life that Snow hurtled us into. If I could change places with her I would. No one would really miss me, give it a few days and I would be forgotten, just a spoiled girl with slightly bad luck, who ended up making it out of the games and back home.

I feel my heart constrict as I force myself to look at Finnick, a sob strangled in my throat as tears gush down my cheeks. Getting up from my seat I walk the small distance to stand in front of Finnick then drop to my knees in front of him as a loud sob leaves my throat and permeates the air around us. Finnick looks up at me with red rimmed eyes, looking practically through me. Biting my lip I stifle another sob and shake my head. "I'm so sorry, really I am. If I could I would trade places with her. She didn't deserve that, Annie didn't deserve that." Get out in a low gasping voice. I watch as Finnick drops his head and his shoulders shake from tears. "No. No, she wouldn't have wanted that. She loved you, Madge. She loved you like a sister. I knew he would do something but I thought it would be to me. That he would hurt me, torture me even, or maybe send me to bed a few men as punishment…I never thought he would kill her." He whispers painfully.

Not being able to contain myself, I fling myself into Finnick, wrapping my arms around his neck tightly as we both are overcome with loud sobs of both pain and sorrow. For the lovely girl who has been lost to the world.

I don't know how long we grasp at each other trying to hold ourselves together, but when we finally pull back from each other our tears have dried and our cheeks are tear stained. We stare at each other silently in the stilled room, the light pitter patter of the rain on the roof the only noise floating through the room.

Looking down at my knotted fingers in my lap I steal myself a calming breath and look back up at Finnick, "so why you're here…you're here for something that relates to Snow?" I hesitantly question, hating the words that are falling from my lips.

I watch as a sarcastic smile spreads across his face, his eyes ablaze with anguish as he nods at me. Lifting the bottle of liquor to his lips he takes a large drink then passes it to me. I take the bottle and take just as big a drink before setting the nearly empty bottle on the floor in front of us. "I'm supposed to be seducing you, can't you tell?" He questions with a fake smile pulling the bottle from the carpet back to his wet lips and taking another pull until the bottle is empty then he lets the bottle drop from his hand with a dull thud on the carpet. He reclines back in his seat and glances around the room, what he's looking for, I can't really guess.

"Aren't I doing a great job of getting into your breeches?"

"Clearly…"

"He called me to see him, Snow, did. He told me I had to prove your act was fake. That you were just playing a very convincing part, the both of you, so he sent me here under the guise of congratulating you both so I could seduce you and get you both a heavily payed slot for him with guests from the Capitol."

His words send a chill of dread down my spine making me want to puke. Sitting back off my knees I pull my knees to my chest and rest my chin on them as I watch as he gets to his feet and retrieves another bottle of liquor. Then with a loud thud he drops to the carpet next to me. His back leaning against my couch as he stretches his long legs out in front of himself. With deft fingers he uncaps the second bottle of liquor then brings the lip to his lips and takes a rather large pull from the bottle before offering it to me.

Already feeling that comforting numb hazy state of mind start to take over me, I take the bottle from his outstretched hand and quickly down a few drinks then wince from the cold burn it leaves on my throat. Dropping my eyes to the lip of the bottle, I let my pointer finger trace over it.

"I swear on my life that I will keep you safe Madge. You're all I have left to care about and I won't stand by idly as Snow tries to get his claws into you and do to you what he is already doing to us. I won't let him. I won't lose someone else I love, not again." Finnick whispers to me in the silent room.

His words weigh heavy on me and I cannot force myself to meet his gaze, feeling entirely guilty for this terrible situation I have lead these people I care about into. First my mom and then Annie, who will be next if I mess up anymore? Could it be my father? Maybe even Gale and his family, or maybe even Peeta or one of the few people in twelve who are my friends.

"I know," I finally am able to mumble out, tightening my grip on the bottle in my hand, hating with every fiber of my being that I am so powerless to all that is happening around us.

"I don't know what to do about the Gale situation." I confide in Finnick, still not feeling brave enough to meet him head on, eye to eye.

"Madge…"

"No, not like that, I just meant about the victory tour. I don't know how I will get through that in one piece. Gale despises me and I'm not too confident he can put on an act now that I know the extent of his hate."

"I don't necessarily think he hates you. I think that he doesn't really know what to do or think now, you got to admit that everything is so out worldly changed and even more so for that asshole. But still that doesn't give him any right to be treating you the way he has been. I pray to the gods that he will be able to pull his head out of his ass long enough to know his life is on the line as well, not just yours. If he can do that then you two are going to be golden."

"I hope you're right. I don't want anyone else to get hurt because of me."

The room stills to an eerie silence and strangely, I welcome it wholeheartedly. For once my mind isn't erratic with thoughts of the Hunger Games or even about Gale, it is peacefully quiet. Smiling to myself, I raise the bottle back to my lips then take a large drink and pass it back to Finnick. Once my hand is empty once more, I get to my feel with a slight stumble in my step, and walk hesitantly over to the very familiar piano that use to reside in my old house. I'm both elated that my father gave it to me as well as depressed that he is putting so much distance between us.

Licking my lips I swallow down the small amount of nerves I have then take a delicate seat on the bench and hold my hands over the pristine black and white keys. My fingers hover wanting to play but not knowing if my playing will be any different. Will the turmoil I suffered in the games change me in this way as well?

With a shuttering exhale I let my fingers drop to the keys with an musical boom that easily puts a smile on my lips. Straightening my posture I adjust my finger placements then close my eyes and play what's in my heart. The music swells around me, and no doubt both Haymitch and Gale's family can hear it. But I can't make myself stop once I've started.

The melody that comes out is hesitant yet joyful, with a large hopeful sense to it that gradually turns sadder and darker before becoming completely taken over by a sinister and ominous tone that I know is full of depression and anger, but mostly a feeling of being lost.

The music from my piano wholly captures me, just like it use to. Feeling pleased this is so, I start to play a lullaby my mother use to both sing to me and play on the piano when I was very little. She might not be here any longer, but that doesn't do anything to take the memories I shared with her, of the few things she taught me in my life before she became so convinced in her addle mind that I was her late twin sister.

I can't make heads of tails of how long I've been consumed in my sorrow filled music. Looking over to where Finnick is, now lying on the ground then empty bottle grasped to his chest while one of my gold and red throw pillows lies comfortably under his head. I stare at him for a moment, silently wondering if I will end up like this as well, drinking myself into a numbed slumber. Though, I guess I am almost half way there. I get to my feet and gently pull a throw blanket from on the back of one of my chairs in the living room then cover Finnick up as slowly as I can, so as not to wake him.

Looking outside I can see that the sky is lighting from the encased darkness that hangs around at night, telling me that in a few hours time it will be time for me to get up and start my day once more.

I climb the stairs with slow placed steps. I'm greatly pleased that I still have a strong drunken stupor to my mindset. Once in my room, I close my bedroom door behind me. Engulfed in the pitch black room I pull off my clothes then stumble around the room until I find the dresser and pull on the first nightgown I can find. With a content sigh, I bundle myself under the thick warm blankets and close my eyes, hoping that sleep will find me soon.

The sun is high in the sky. All around me I can see the lush green forest. My eyes swiftly search around my surroundings, on the alert. To my left the small trail leading further into the woods looks light and inviting while the right looks dark and dooming. I don't even have to stop before I turn to walk down the left side only to stop as it immediately turns dark and bleak. I stare with confusion down the path then turn to go down the other one but don't make it more than a step as I see the same sight in front of me as the one before. I pause and look back and forth down the paths that are identical, feeling a sense of dread swelling in side of me. I keep looking back and forth at the two trails only to freeze at the shrill scream that can only be identified as Rue's. In an instant I take off down the right trail as fast as my legs will let me go. My heart pounds erratically in my chest, feeling extremely tight and non existent. I try to ignore the damp deep red on the grass that is unmistakable, blood. Going a bit further into the woods I take brief notice of the completely too still figures that lay lumped on the ground in strange angles that leaves me feeling ill.

The leaves and tree branches smack into my face concealing my sight only for me to trip over a tree root and come crashing down to the ground with a rough slam. A snap of light sparks through my eyelids and the familiar taste of coppery and grainy dirt in my mouth. With a panting gasp I shove myself up from the ground only for the shrill screaming to stop and my blood to run cold. I suck in a scared breath then bolt off towards I last heard Rue's screams coming from. As I come crashing through a thicket of lush green shrubs I am immediately pulled to a halt as a big hand fastens around my throat and a burning pain sears through my stomach. My breathing picks up in sharp choked spurts as I stare into familiar gray eyes of Gale Hawthorne. I watch in a dazed state as his lips pull up into a sinister smile, "you're dead mutt," he breaths gleefully. I feel my air being cut off more effectively, causing my eyes to bulge in there sockets. At the feeling of a warm wet liquid spilling down my front, I glance down only to stare in horror at the heavy flow of blood spilling out of me from the large dagger thrust into my stomach. Looking back up at Gale, I feel my vision blur with tears then start to cloud and blacken before everything is a vast void of darkness and I feel utterly nothing.


End file.
